18 comments on “I Don’t Know What to Say!

  1. I love that phrase “ministry of presence” and that is exactly what one needs in times of grief and sorrow. The insensitivity of the disciples always boggles my mind. What is wrong with them, what is wrong with me?????? It is that they and I still have an earthly perspective, not an eternal one. That is what I need to remember as well if and when someone calls me but it is also “my” lack of compassion that uproots me and needs to be uprooted for more often than not I tend to speak before listening, speak before thinking. Oh, this is such a great reminder that I would have the “ministry of presence” and not the opposite.

  2. Pingback: I’ll sit with you in the dark | Just me being curious

  3. Don, reading your message brought my brother to mind; my brother has been (and continues to be) my rock on earth. For reasons known only to God, my brother is the only human who just listens to me. If he has the time (and he often calls while driving to a job because he has the time then) he will let me talk…about everything. I can vent, cuss, whine, cry,… He may be working on his computer while I talk, but he is still listening; I know, because he will comment and reply if it is appropriate. He never says that I should or shouldn’t be doing such and such or that I shouldn’t be saying such and such. He ocassionally says that he has no appropriate response to some of the stupidity or hardship I have received at the hand of others that I relate to him. At the end, he may make a suggestion or remind me that it is better now than it was this time last year or point out that I am stronger for whatever it is I have endured. But he reminds me that he loves me and that he appreciates what I do for family, neighbors, etc. He takes me seriously when I talk about some of the malicious hacking I have endured and gives me reasonable and sensible suggestions. He never talks down to me and in fact points out that he is only a little below me in the intelligence department. He listens when I talk about things scientific, spiritual, technological, or about business. He often follows my suggestions and has told others that he no longer doubts the validity of climate change data and that it is because of the part I played in developing the programs to gather, quality control, and analyse the data. (He actually respects me for it …and for other aspects of my life…and this is making me cry as I write this because respect and accepting my credibility is something I have rarely experienced in my life.) He never hangs up on me or rolls his eyes (as so many other have). He never ignores my phone calls (unless he is in a meeting or fishing…and even then he calls me right after or sends a text that he is fishing and will call later.)

    I am extremely grateful for and proud of my brother. He lives as a disciple of Christ without ever making that his goal. He just lives it. He is ‘Good People’ supreme. He is wise and takes every opportunity to make a less than good situation and turn it into a constructive opportunity to improve someone else’s outlook, treatment of others, or empowerment…and he takes no notice of it. In fact, he always tells me of these situations with surprise at the outcome.

    I love my brother. He is God’s gift to me and he has saved my life several times.

    By the way, Don, I have deleted all of my blogs. I didn’t see any evidence that I was reaching anyone beyond ‘the choir,’ and I am dropping “off the grid.” My handicapped sister is moving to this area from Alaska and I will be watching after her. As far being an ambassador, I will be doing something else toward those ends. I will continue to receive new posts from about 5 or 6 of you and will stop by on ocassion.

    Blessings and God’s peace,


    • I’m sorry to hear that Kitsy… the part about your blog that is… but I know the feeling. I’ve almost done the same thing more than once myself. Stop by from time to time if you can; it’ll be great to hear from you!

  4. Bodily presents is an important and almost essential thing for humans. Babies do not always hear us speaking to them, but they know our presence by our touch and our warmth. In times of trouble, most humans want the presence of another person over the volumes someone can speak or the lip service others could possibly give.


  5. That’s true what you say sometimes people just need your company or a listening ear they don’t necessarily want or need to hear anything from you but I’m coming over.
    What i would say if I was to say anything would depend on whether the persons spouse knew Jesus.
    If they did i would focus on the joy of being in a place free from pain, sin and criticism.
    If they didn’t i would try to get them to focus on their blessings instead of their loss n urge them to cherish the precious memories of a shared life however few or many chapters they happened to write in their partners story.
    Definitely a prayer for comfort can cut across all religious affiliations or lack thereof.

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